For the right woman
by YouOnlyKnowWhatIWantYouTo
Summary: JT's advice to his Jax about how to keep and please the woman you love :-)
1. Chapter 1

Hi guys,

I'm back with a new story which kind of follows in the same vein as 'What I want for you' but from a JT/Jax perspective. Basically it's JT giving Jax advice on how to keep and please the woman he loves, which we see Jax do through flashbacks. I think that we need a little lightness as Jax and Tara seem to be having a pretty tough time this season. So, I hope you enjoy and any reviews are welcomed :-)

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Sons of Anarchy or anything associated with it, that's all Mr Kurt Sutter's. The quotes used are from artwork called 'Primitives' by Kathy, they are not mine either.

23rd February 1993

A little under a year before John Teller's fateful bike accident, JT called his eldest and only surviving son, into the family's study.

A fourteen year old Jax stood in the doorway, racking his brain around what he might have done wrong. He could take the heat from Gemma and her loud mouth as she screamed at him for messing up yet again but there was something even more intimidating about the disappointment that Jax saw in JT's eyes if he was in trouble.

"Sit down son"

JT motioned for Jax to sit on the sofa that faced the back leather chair that he sat on. Jax sat down on the couch, constantly running over in his mind what misdemeanour he was about to get called out on. He anxiously waited for his dad to start.

JT fidgeted in his chair, clasping his hands together as if praying for strength to help him through this conversation. "It's occurred to me son that we've never really sat down to talk about something"

Jax twitched nervously in his seat. Christ, he wanted to have 'that' conversation. Jax smirked across at his father.

"Look dad, you don't need to tell me about the birds and the bees. Mom sat me down years ago and told me all about it"

Jax didn't need to inform his dad that he had lost his own virginity four months prior to the conversation they were having now. He'd lost it to some croweater called Sally…or was it Sarah?... maybe it was Sandy?

Embarrassment flushed through JT's pale cheeks as Jax's words washed over him. Christ, he didn't want to have that conversation either.

"No, no. That's not what I'm talking about son. I want to talk about …." JT twitched slightly before continuing "…girls"

Jax looked at his father expectantly. Wasn't that what they had just been talking about? In Jax's mind girls were good for just one thing. Sex.

JT cleared his throat "There's gonna be a day son when you're going to want an Old Lady. You're going to want to settle down and raise your own family"

Jax shook his head, his blonde hair shaking with the movement "Nah, I don't think so. All I've ever wanted is to be part of the club, a Harley and a kutte will do me just fine"

The look of disappointment that flashed across JT's face didn't go unnoticed by his eldest son "I hope not. There's more to life than Samcro, Jackson"

This truly confused Jax. Hadn't his Old Man set up the club? Hadn't Samcro been his baby that he had seen grow? Why did he not want Jax to be part of that?

"One day son, and it may not be anytime soon, you will want to find a girl who you will want to build a life with. I know we've never really discussed this before, but I want you to find someone who is going to love you for the person you are Jackson, not because of the kutte on your back"

JT shuffled in his seat a little more, inching closer to his son "**_So when you find her, and you will find her one day, here's my advice to you….." _**


	2. Listen to her secrets

**_…Listen to her secrets…_**

"Truth or dare Knowles?"

Jax looked over at Tara as he asked the question. He hoped she would say dare, so that he could proposition her to kiss him. Why such thoughts should enter his mind he had no idea, other than he was an adolescent sixteen year old boy who had recently noticed that she was getting curves in all the right places, that her smile, for some unknown reason, gave his stomach butterflies every time he saw it. Was it right that he was having these feelings about a girl that he had known, only ever as a friend, since he was six years old?

Tara considered the question for a moment, for a brief second Jax thought that he might get his wish, until Tara's beautiful lips blurted out "Truth"

Jax's shoulders sagged a little and he took a swig of his beer. He considered his question. "Ok. If you had to sleep with anyone at this party, who would it be?"

Opie chuckled as he brought his bottle up to his lips. It was typical that Jax would choose a question about sex. Tara gulped down some of her beer and looked around at the guys that had joined in the game. Jax had propositioned her, Opie and Lowell to a game of truth or dare because, in his opinion, it was the only thing that could 'liven up this party'. That and the beer that they were swigging back.

They were sitting at the far end of Chloe Jennings' back yard, immersed in their game. Every now and then a blonde bombshell, or bimbo, as Tara liked to call them, tried to beckon Jax away but he had wanted to keep going until Tara had a turn.

Tara initially looked uncomfortable. She thought that Jax probably knew she was a virgin and yet he was asking her something so personal in such a public place. But this was just hypothetical, right?

"You" she answered, looking Jax straight in the eye.

Opie spluttered his beer as it had gone down the wrong way. In all honesty he had been shocked by Tara's bluntness. He was not expecting Tara to give such a sassy answer. Lowell shifted uncomfortably on the ground, tearing out handfuls of grass. Subjects like this always made him nervous.

But Jax stayed as still as stone as he held Tara's gaze. He was trying to gage whether she was serious or not, whether she really was attracted to him or if she was calling his bluff. He knew though, within just a few seconds of her answering him, that she was deadly serious. She continued to meet his stare, her green eyes never leaving his blue. She bowed her head slightly so that her hair cascaded over the right side of her face, acting as a barrier to any outsiders looking in on their intimate moment.

He wet his lips, maybe he was still in with a chance of that kiss "Why?"

Tara smiled back, her unblinking gaze never leaving his handsome face. She was about to answer when Opie, feeling extremely awkward, interrupted.

"Woah, you had your question Jax. Time to spin again" Jax had never wanted to hit his best friend before, until this very moment.

After three more go's, and never landing on Tara again, she excused herself to go and get another beer. Jax watched her leave and desperately wanted to follow.

"I need to get a beer too" he said as he started to get up, brushing off the grass that had stuck to his jeans.

"You just got one" Opie answered, not cottoning on to the real reason Jax wanted to leave their company.

Jax took a final swig of his nearly full drink and emptied the remainder onto the ground next to him "Nope. I'm all out, and I'm thirsty"

And with that Jax left Opie and Lowell to the game that he had initiated, following Tara inside the house, wanting to continue their conversation.

If the truth be told Tara was never a party goer. It was never on her agenda to be the most popular girl in school, her only aim was to get good grades and get out of Charming as soon as possible. She had only come out tonight because Chloe had invited her. They shared Math class together and Chloe had mentioned in passing that Tara should come along. Knowing that Jax, Opie and Lowell would be there to meant that she wouldn't be entirely alone, even though she knew at some point Jax would take advantage of the beautiful girls that were on offer and would disappear for half the night, as he usually did.

When Jax entered the kitchen he saw Tara helping herself to the beer that was on offer. He swaggered up to her, a playful smile on his lips "Got one for me?"

Tara picked up one of the bottles and placed it to her mouth, neatly cracking the bottle top off with her teeth "Jesus Christ Knowles. You pick that up etiquette school?"

Tara giggled and handed him the beer. They stood in silence for a moment, taking in the teenage drunken debauchery around them. Jax was the first to bite the bullet.

"So you'd sleep with me, huh?" he raised his eyebrow as he looked across at Tara.

She smiled, a sudden shyness made her look down at the white tiled floor "Obviously, only if I _had_ too"

"Obviously" Jax nodded. He questioned whether he should continue this conversation, by pursuing this he might royally fuck up a good friendship. He might not have if he hadn't seen Tara differently in recent months, if his feelings for her had started to shift from friendship into something, well, something else. He bit his lip for a moment, resting his weight on the sideboard, his hand stuffed into his pocket, the other grasping the ice cold beer. Should he pursue this? He looked across at Tara, who seemed to be focused on watching the others around her. But there was something about her stance that told him that she wanted him to continue the conversation.

"You never answered my question. Why me?"

Tara brought the bottle up to her lips and smiled coyly. She shook her head as she took a long sip.

"I'd be giving away my secrets if I told you" she answered.

Jax shifted his body so that he faced Tara, more intrigued than ever "Hey, I can keep a secret Knowles. I'm all ears"

His heart beat uncontrollably. Was she about to admit she had feelings for him? Had he completely overlooked any signals that she might have given him?

Tara glanced up at him and bit her bottom lip. "Ok. When we were younger, I had a major crush on you. I used to talk to my mom about marrying you and about the babies that we'd have. I was adamant that one day we'd end up together"

Jax's eyes lit up. How had he not known about this? "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Jax, I was six. It was a crush. I was stupid" she blushed slightly, her secret exposed.

Jax couldn't help but feel elated but a sudden disappointment rushed through him. She had had a crush on him but it had been years ago.

"What about now?" he asked.

Tara shrugged, not seeing the point to his question "What _about_ now?"

"How do you feel about me now?" Jax probed. Why did that question make him feel so nervous? He gave her a smug grin as he looked across at her in a desperate bid to hide any nerves.

Tara looked around the room but took a step closer to Jax. She could feel the alcohol surging through her body, making her a little bolder than she would normally be. She stopped when her face was just inches from his, until he could smell both the alcohol on her lips and the Lavender soap she used. It made him lick his lips. She looked up at him and sensually brought the bottle up to her lips once more, before taking another long sip and gulping down the liquor that gave her this renewed confidence.

"Now Jax, you're everyone else's crush"

She looked around the room and saw that most of the female contingency was looking in their direction. Each pair of eyes were resting on the Prince of Samcro. It seemed that most of the female population of Charming High had realised how good looking Jackson Teller was.

"It seems I have to share you Jax." If he wasn't mistaken he thought he could see disappointment etched on her face, or maybe that was wishful thinking on his behalf. She shrugged it off "I guess we're not six anymore"

And she leaned in to stroke his handsome face, stealing one last look before leaving the other girls in the room to get one step closer to the boy that she had once been so adamant that she would one day marry.

But she had loved him first, she frustratingly thought, as she walked away from him, leaving him victim to the usual onslaught of female admiration.


	3. call her first

**_Hey guys. This is a really short chapter, for which I can only apologise, things have been a little manic and I haven't had much time to add anything. I can promise a longer chapter next time though._**

**_As always, thanks for the reviews and PM's and it's good to see that we have so many Jax and Tara fans!_**

**_Enjoy xx_**

**_….call her first…._**

They had fought before. Their fights had been witnessed in the school yard, at the clubhouse, even in Main Street. Once when they had been arrested together, after getting a little too intimate in Pointers Creek, Unser had locked them in a cell together where they had screamed and shouted at each other to their hearts content. But five minutes later, Unser had returned to make sure they hadn't ripped each other apart. He needn't have worried, as he had expected they had kissed and made up, as they always did. He bashfully shook his head as he witnessed them acting out their wild teenage love in their cell, with Jax and Tara's bodies passionately entangled against the cell wall. Their words of animosity now replaced with words of undying love.

This was always the way with Jax Teller and Tara Knowles. Their love for each other bordered on wild obsession and sometimes that spilled out into these rash moments where arguments occurred. But more recently Tara had been talking about moving away from Charming, to fulfil her childhood dream of becoming a surgeon.

This had resulted in today's argument. Now sitting in his bedroom at his house Jax gritted his teeth as he replayed the argument in his head. What could he say that would stop her thinking that life was so much better outside of Charming? Her tear stained face flashed through his mind and he grimaced, bringing his hands to his face. He had said some hurtful shit. He reached for the phone.

She answered on the second ring, knowing that he was probably at home, going over the argument in his head, just as she had been.

"Hey" she didn't need to ask who it was.

"Hey"

An awkward silence ensued, neither one wanting to admit that they had been wrong but both knowing that they had said things that they now regretted.

"Tara, I'm sorry about what I said. It's just, the thought of you leaving, it scares the shit out of me babe"

Tara swallowed, guilt engulfed her. She didn't want to leave him, if anything he would be the only reason that she would stay. But she couldn't help but think life was calling her away from this place, in search of something bigger than Charming. She was suffocating and she needed to get out.

"I know. I don't want to hurt you Jax. I just –"

"Look, we both said things we regret. Let's just put it behind us. Clay needs me on a run tomorrow night so I won't be around. Can I see you now?"

This is how it had been recently. Jax never let Tara expand on how she was feeling about leaving, almost like he could brush it aside, so they could both forget about the outrageous idea that she could leave him. But Tara knew there were only so many times the issue could be ignored before she had to make a decision about college.

But for now she chose him, because the only thoughts that she had were about having him here with her now, having him close, having him inside of her. This was their kiss and make up, their usual routine after these fights. Her long fingers entwined with the cord on the phone and she closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, willing her voice to sound stronger than she was feeling. It seemed that Jackson Teller was her weakness.

"Sure, my dad's out. Come on over"

Even without being able to see him she knew Jax was smiling, knew he had won some small victory and had won her around. He hung up, eager to show her how sorry he was, keen to show her how sorry she would be if she left him.

But Tara knew that whichever one she had to give up on she'd be heartbroken either way.


	4. Label her as yours

**_Hi guys._**

**_A slightly longer chapter, as promised. As always, thanks for the PM's/reviews - they put a smile on my face!_**

**_xxxxx_**

**_Label her as yours….._**

It hadn't been their choice to announce to the club that Tara had got the Crow tattoo. It had happened in a moment of rage. In fact, Tara got the tattoo three weeks before anyone other than her and Jax knew about it, they liked the idea that only they were privy to it, that it was their little secret.

She had just turned seventeen when he had asked her to get the tattoo. He wasn't sure how she would react, whether she would welcome such a bold statement. He knew Tara well enough to know that when it came to matters of the heart, like their relationship, Tara liked to keep things private. It wasn't out of shame, she would happily shout from the rooftops that she was his, but she didn't understand why the world and his wife would need to know that they were together.

Until one day she had to prove it.

Tara had been coming to the Samcro parties for some time. She knew that they got a little hot and heavy, that a younger, more naïve Tara had blushed at the antics of some members and their debauchery, but she had come to accept that this was the way of the club and Samcro was part of Jax. If she loved him she had to accept that.

After one of the more stressful club meetings the members had chosen to let off some steam. When Tara had arrived, a little after ten, the booze was flowing freely and the women were more scantily clad than when they had first arrived.

She walked through the crowded clubhouse looking for Jax, unable to make him out through the thick haze of smoke. She was stopped by various members, who were all glad to see the girl that had tamed the wild Prince of Samcro, the girl who they were all starting to accept as Jax's Old Lady.

It was over Bobby's shoulder that she saw Jax. She smiled at how the alcohol was slowly starting to affect his movement, which was laboured, as he brought a cigarette up to his lips. She was about to approach him when she saw some blonde lean into him, her lips just inches away from his face.

Tara felt as if she had been hit in the stomach, the air left her lungs. Was Jax sleeping with this whore? But Tara was reassured when Jax leaned away from her, a confused look on his face and he slowly shook his head at whatever she had asked him. With a smug smile Tara realised that he wasn't interested in the croweater, but that didn't stop her eager hands making their way up his thighs, slowly getting closer and closer to his crotch. The pain that Tara had felt in her stomach now turned into red hot rage and before she was even aware of it her hand was at the back of the girls head, grabbing her dirty blonde curls.

Tara had never been in a fight before. She had never been one for confrontation, always deciding that reasoning was the best solution. But she had seen Jax handle himself in a fight, seen the rage in him that now ravaged her own body. It would seem that some things you had to fight for and, for Tara, Jax was one of them. Tara knew she had two things in her favour here, surprise and sobriety.

Reason told her not to but the rage yelled at her to prove her point. If she was going to prove she was Old Lady material why not do it here? Why not set this bitch straight, and all the others that thought they might have a chance with Jax, right here in the clubhouse?

So she did.

Her one hand grabbed the back of the girls head, ripping some of the golden tresses as she yanked her head back, causing the croweater to yell in pain. The other hand grabbed the top of the girls arm, with Tara's nails becoming embedding in the crow eaters taut skin. With one swift movement Tara yanked the girls head back and then slammed it forward into the wooden bar where she and Jax had been sitting. Blood gushed everywhere and the crunch of cartilage confirmed that Tara had broken the girl's nose, causing her to scream in agony.

Tara took a step back, a little shocked at her actions but still ready to react if the girl decided to retaliate. She noticed that Jax had got to his feet and a quick glance his way showed that he too was surprised by what had just gone down.

Everyone around them stopped to watch what had happened, amazed that sweet innocent Tara had such violence in her. Tig was the only one to break the silence as he cheered and applauded Tara's retaliation.

"Yeah, good girl Tara!" he bellowed across the clubhouse and his hands clapped together to show his support, causing Jax to briefly smirk across at him.

The girl's hands cupped her broken nose in a desperate attempt to stop the blood from gushing out, staining her satin white top. In horror she looked across at Tara "What the fuck?!"

Tara clenched her fists, ready to hit the girl if she made a move towards her "That's what you get bitch if you make a move on my man"

Tara couldn't see Jax but she knew that he had a shit eating grin on his face. Jax had seen girls fight over him before, the pathetic slapping and curse words being tossed between them. But he had never seen the girl he loved become so possessive over him. He quickly realised that it was a real turn on. Tara was proving what he already knew, that she was perfect Old Lady material. His sparkling baby blues glanced over at Gemma, who was standing the other side of the bar, her eyes narrowing. He could see that his mother was coming to the same conclusion too, albeit reluctantly.

The croweater looked across at a smirking Jax and realising that she would get no support from him, played the only card she had "I don't see a wedding ring, sweetheart, so in my eyes he's still up for grabs"

Tara sneered at her opponent, who was only a couple of years older than her. Jax watched her, saw her wrath and wanted to see how Tara would play it. She took one step closer to the girl.

"I may not have a ring yet sweetheart, but I have the crow, which makes me as good as his wife"

And with that Tara turned her back to the crow eater and raised the hem of her t shirt, exposing the label that made her Jax's.

There were a few murmurs from members and crow eaters. Everyone knew you didn't label a girl unless you were deadly serious about her being an Old Lady. After a few moments of stunned silence, causing Jax to hold his breath in anticipation, the young prince was slapped on the back by a few of his brothers and he gazed over at his mother, whose face was like thunder. She now knew the woman who would one day replace her as the Queen of Samcro. Despite this Jax couldn't help but smile, pride swelling in his heart for Tara.

Tara edged closer to the crow eater and raised her hand, her green eyes becoming a little darker and pointed a finger in her face, which made the girl momentarily flinch. Tara made her voice loud and clear, to get the message across to any other crow eater that may have had thoughts about Jax.

"If you make one more move on my guy, I'll make sure it's not just your nose that I break. Are we clear?"

Tara's tone was enough to frighten her but that didn't stop the girl from momentarily sneering back at her. For a moment Tara thought the girl would pounce on her but Tara could see the rage in the girls sapphire eyes die down.

_That's it bitch, walk away_ she thought.

The girl clutched her broken nose and hastily walked passed Tara, making her way out of the club, comforted by two or three other eager crows.

As Tara watched the girl leave she felt Jax's hands creep around her hips and settle on her taut stomach. His head nuzzled into her neck, kissing her hot skin gently.

She was his, and now the whole world and his wife knew it.


	5. wipe away her tears

**_Sorry about the delay guys, it's been pretty hectic. Thank you for the followers/reviews/PM's - all are welcomed. Here is another chapter for you to (hopefully) enjoy xxx_**

**_Wipe away her tears…._**

Jax and Tara were nine years old when he first proposed to her.

The Teller's and the Knowles', along with various other friends and club members, had gathered to celebrate Thomas Teller's third birthday. Breaking from tradition, Gemma and JT arranged a picnic in Pointer's Creek, rather than the Clubhouse. Gemma knew that the Creek would be a more peaceful place for her baby's third birthday.

Tara sat by the creek, alone, watching the water, letting the soothing sound wash over her. She cast a look behind her, at her mother. Catherine Knowles laughed along with her friends, her jet black hair was cropped short and was starting to grow back thanks to the fact that she had stopped the chemo.

But the chemo had stopped because it couldn't fight the cancer.

Tara breathed deeply, her breath ragged with emotion. She knew her mother didn't have long left. Tara had seen her mom grimace in pain this morning, even getting dressed was a chore, but she had bravely smiled through the agony, informing a concerned Tara that she wouldn't miss this day for the world.

Tara didn't look at Jax as he sat down beside her. He crossed his legs and fiddled with a piece of grass, staring out onto the water in front of them. In years to come, unbeknown to them now, this would be the place where Tara gave her virginity to him.

"My mom wants to know if you want some birthday cake?" Jax asked timidly, sensing something was wrong with Tara. He knew because she hadn't wanted to join in on the games he and Opie were playing, wanting instead to sit by herself most of the day.

Tara stubbornly shook her head, if she spoke she might cry and that was something she didn't want to do in front of Jax.

Jax glanced behind him, taking in the scene. His mom was serving up Thomas's birthday cake, his baby brother, who the doctors said was lucky to be seeing his third birthday, was being held tightly in his father's arms. The crowd around them, many of them club members, were laughing and joking. But Jax's eyes rested on Catherine Knowles who looked back at Jax, giving him a reassuring smile.

It was Catherine who had asked Jax to sit by Tara and spend some time with her. She knew that her sickness was a concern to her daughter, that her impending death lay heavy on Tara's mind. But she also knew that the only person that could cheer Tara up would be Jax. She had seen a bond develop between the two in recent years. She hoped the bond would develop into something more but she was sorry that she wouldn't be around to witness that, if it happened.

"You're mom wanted me to come and sit with you for a while" Jax whispered.

Tara's unblinking stare settled on the water. "She's dying, Jax"

Jax shifted uncomfortably on the ground. He didn't know much about death but he knew that Catherine must be frightened, that Tara must be sad that she will lose her mom.

"I know" his voice broke slightly. It seemed that he too would be sad at Catherine Knowles's passing.

Fury raged through Tara as she suddenly ripped up some of the grass from the ground, thinking of the injustice of it all. "I'm never getting married. That way I won't hurt anyone if I die. No one will care"

Jax watched her tear at the grass frantically and reached out to stop her, his small hand grasped her tiny wrist.

"I'd care. I wouldn't want you to die" he offered innocently, noticing the tears start to trickle down her face, feeling helpless that he couldn't do anything to stop her pain.

Tara got up quickly from where she sat and walked further away from the group, closer to the solitude of the woods by the side of the creek. Jax hastily followed.

"Just because you don't want someone to die doesn't mean they won't. My mom's dying and just because I don't want her too doesn't mean that she'll live, that she'll stay with me" her words were barely audible because of the onslaught of tears.

Jax glanced over his shoulder. They were far enough away from the party for Tara's sobs not to be overheard and it was a realisation that distressed him. He'd never seen a girl cry like this before. He gave her a few moments, not sure what he should do. Her sobs became louder and he was sure that Opie would venture this way soon enough, bored of the adult conversation and eager to play a game of tig with Jax. But Jax didn't want Opie to see Tara this upset, didn't want her to feel humiliated by having another witness to her heartache. He wanted her to know that she was wanted.

So he dropped down to his knee.

He'd seen it done in a dozen movies, the sloppy ones that Gemma always liked to watch at the weekends, where the boy would tell the girl that he loved her, that she was the best thing in his world and that he would die without her.

Jax didn't know he had actually dropped to his knee until Tara turned to look at him, her sobs momentarily stopping, her eyes widening at the realisation of what he was doing. She had seen this in the movies too.

Jax quickly swept his blonde hair out of his eyes, battling with the soft breeze that blew against his face.

"Tara, you're wrong. If something bad happened to you, if you were hurt I would get really mad. My dad says that if you find a girl that you would die to protect, if you can't imagine your life without her in it, then you should make her yours, like he did with my mom. I think you're a great girl, and I'd die to protect you and I would never want to be away from you. So, what I think I'm saying is, one day, when we're grown up and I'm in the Club and when I can give you a beautiful life, do you think that….maybe…..you'd…marry me?"

It was a proposal that over the next few years the two would tease each other over. A moment of stupidity, a time when Jax had acted rashly in order to make Tara happy. But many years down the line, whilst Tara was in Chicago, both would remember it as the moment when their friendship turned a corner, the first time that one of them, even at nine years old, hinted at feelings deeper than just friendship. It was a memory that both would treasure until their dying breath.

Tara looked down at Jax with a mixture of confusion and amusement. She fiddled with the ribbon that her mom had put in her hair that morning as she pondered his request for a few moments in shocked silence.

Jax's knee started to hurt. He tried to hide his discomfort through a grimaced smile. The boys in the movies never flinched in pain, so neither would he. But normally the girls in those films would give an answer straight away. And Tara sure was taking her time.

"Okay" she replied slowly, as if not completely sure of her answer "But as soon as we're married you and me need to visit Florida, on the back of your Harley…."

"Alright" Jax replied. Jeez, his knee was killing him.

Tara had always wanted to visit Disney World and with her mom's sickness she didn't think she would be able to now. _Maybe with Jax we could have a honeymoon there!_ Her excited nine year old brain thought.

"And then we can buy a little house by the water and I will give you three babies….." she continued, her face becoming more animated as she could picture this beautiful life that Jax now wanted to give her.

"Okay" Jax groaned, trying to shift his weight in a desperate attempt to stop the agony in his knee. Why the hell don't the movies tell you that proposals were this painful?

"…two boys and a girl….." Tara said, her head desperately thinking of names for their non-existent babies.

"Tara, whatever you want" Jax said as he stood up, his knee locking back into place as an excited Tara paced back and forth, mapping out their lives together. Jax took a step closer to her.

"Are you happier now?" Jax asked as his hand came up to softly brush her cheek, wiping away the remnants of her tears from moments ago.

Tara let him brush away her last tear and smiled at him, nodding slowly. This was the part in the movies, after she had said yes, that they were supposed to kiss, wasn't it? Tara licked her lips expectantly. She'd never kissed a boy before.

But their moment was disturbed as they heard the crunch of leaves. Someone was coming to find them. They both turned in the direction of the sound to see Catherine Knowles walking hesitantly towards them.

"Is everything ok here kids?" she asked, her big blue eyes looking from one nine year old to the other.

Tara looked across at her mom and her mind momentarily thought back to the fact that Catherine was severely ill but somehow, her heart didn't feel as heavy as it had a few minutes earlier. Tara looped her arm through Jax's as they started to walk towards her and join the rest of the party.

"Everything's fine mom. Me and Jax are getting married"

As the two children walked away from her, hand in hand, Catherine Knowles couldn't help but acknowledge what a lovely sight the two of them made together.


	6. ask her to dance with you

**_Hey guys. I'm feeling a little more hopeful for our OTP after last nights episode and thought it was time to update. This flashback takes place at Opie's wedding, right before the shot of Jax and Tara dancing at the end of the episode (as well as a little flashback to that amazing hug in the pilot episode) _**

**_As always, thanks for your reviews and PM's and to the people who are not only following this story but are following/made a favourite of my others too._**

**_Ask her to dance with you…._**

As he walked back to join the party, Jax's eyes quickly assessed the shirt he was wearing. It wouldn't look good if he walked through the crowds with his shirt and Kutte covered in the dead Russian's blood. Tara didn't need to know that he had just stabbed a guy to death in retaliation for his attack in Stockton. He quickly remembered back to the day Abel was born, when being told by Tara that he had survived his surgery he had swept Tara into a hug. It had been a moment of joy but as he pressed his body into hers he was overcome by the feelings that he had once had for her. A love that he had never lost for her. As they broke their embrace, Jax could see the blood that had seeped from his clothing onto Tara's meticulous white lab coat. The contact was a reminder of their love, the smear of blood a reminder of the club. The two had never mixed. One it seemed, tainted the other.

_"Clean yourself up Jax" _

Her voice had been full of disgust and disappointment. Her eyes, as they had done years before, echoed her hatred for Samcro and what he'd become because of it.

But that was what he was doing now, he was cleaning himself up. He was getting out.

Jax now made his way through the throng of people, on the way embracing some of the brothers from different charters, happy that so many could come and celebrate Opie and Lyla's big day.

After pulling away from some of the members of the Washington charter, Jax glanced at the dance floor. He couldn't see Tara, which was unusual as she hadn't been off the damn thing all night. He knew she loved to dance, especially when she was drunk. He, on the other hand, would do anything to avoid making a spectacle of himself.

But tonight she had danced away to her hearts content. Jax had hung back, deep in conversation with his brothers, their minds focused on the task at hand - to kill Putlova. But every now and again Jax's face would soften as he would look across at Tara, the woman that he had asked to marry that day. The woman that had accepted his proposal. Not that anyone other than he, Tara and Gemma knew about it though. His smile broadened a little as he looked at her, dancing without a care in the world. She had danced with the majority of the club tonight, even dancing with Opie, his towering frame looking awkward as he tried to be as nimble as Tara.

But now, hours later, as Putlova's blood seeped out of the dead corpse and stained the forest behind him, Jax scoured the crowds for the familiar sight of Tara. He couldn't see her. Jax frowned and he swivelled his head, quickly assessing each female face he saw. Tara was nowhere to be seen. Jax's mouth went dry and he could hear his weak heart hammering in his chest. He quickened his pace through the crowds as panic started to seize him. What if the Russians had second guessed him? What if they had taken her?

The hairs on the back of his neck stood on end and he now started to jog through the crowd, his eyes darting form one woman's face to another. He ignored the calls from his brothers, those eager to embrace and reminisce with the VP of the mother charter. After another minute's search he ran across to Tig and Kozik, who were busy knocking back beers in a bid to unwind after their murder spree.

Jax jogged over to them, his hand reaching out to settle on Tig's shoulder "Tig, Kozik, you seen Tara?"

Both men looked at each other, and shrugged, Tig answering for them "No brother, haven't seen her since…well, since before the 'meeting' tonight"

"Shit" Jax muttered, his mind trying to find a reasonable explanation for her absence. His eyes frantically searched the crowds.

It was then that he heard her laugh, her unmistakable giggle. He turned on his heel and through the crowds he saw her, her arm looping through that of his mothers, both were laughing uncontrollably at something one of them had said. He let his anxiety quell as he watched her, laughing wholeheartedly. Her smile bringing one to his own lips. Any anxiety he felt instantly left him.

Jax turned back around to Tig and Kozik, who had both ventured away to look for her themselves.

"Boys" Jax caught their eye "It's ok, I got her. Thanks"

He sauntered through the crowd, hands in his pockets, enjoying the sight of his mother and Tara getting along. It hadn't always been that way, Jax could remember the catfights that had taken place between the two women when he and Tara were teens.

Gemma was the first to see Jax approach them "Well here he is… your fiancée"

Tara playfully tugged at Gemma's arm and brought her finger to her lips, reminding Gemma that they were to keep it secret until after Opie's wedding. Jax shook his head, smiling. He was surprised that Gemma had been able to keep such momentous news quiet for so long. Looking around them though, both Jax and Tara realised no one had overheard Gemma's declaration.

"Hey baby" Gemma holding her hands out to clasp her beloved sons face, planting at kiss on his cheek. "Have you seen Clay?"

_Yeah, he's busy burying the body of a dead Russian._ Jax feigned any knowledge by shaking his head "No, no doubt he's around here somewhere"

Gemma placed her hands on her slender hips, now looking around for her newly released husband "Right, I need to go and relieve Aleeta. You two enjoy the night"

She took it in turn to hug and kiss both her son and soon to be daughter in law goodnight and then left them together. Jax brought his arm around Tara's shoulders, holding her tightly to his side, mainly because he didn't want to lose sight of her again but also because it felt good to be able to hold her close, in the outside air, surrounded by the people they love, rather than a few stolen moments in a prison visiting area, which had been their routine for the last fourteen months.

He gazed down at her, their faces just inches apart. He could see she was a little tipsy. "You good?

She nodded slowly, bringing her hand up to caress his face.

"Jackson!" a voice boomed across field, interrupting their moment.

Jackson's head turned to see the red tinted face of Uncle Jury, who was waving him over to join the company. Tara followed Jax's gaze and smiled sadly.

"I think you're wanted" she whispered.

Jax waved back but shook his head at Jury. "No, I'm not. And even if I was it would be nothing that couldn't wait until after we dance"

Tara's brows rose in surprise, Jax rarely asked her to dance. She knew he hated it. "You want to dance?"

Jax smiled down into Tara's eyes, his hands now resting on her hips, bringing her closer to him. "Well isn't it tradition that the best man and maid of honour hook up during these things?"

She saw the glint in his eye, a small laugh escaping her lips "I think the tradition is that they _dance_"

Jax held his hands up in surrender, a devilish glint in his eye "Well darlin' we'll start off with a dance and then see where the night takes us, but I'm not promising anything"

And he grabbed her hand, leading a giggling Tara to the dance floor.


	7. never imagine life without her

Hi all. So onto the next chapter...This was originally a flashback that featured in a fic that I wrote a long time ago (and is still to be published) that focused on Tara's return to Charming but it fitted in so wonderfully with JT's advice that I had to steal it and fit it in here.

And for anyone wondering why this fic is rated M, you'll find out in the next chapter (hints: Jax + Tara + a bedroom wall)

Until then, enjoy xx

**_Never imagine life without her…._**

The party had been in full swing for some time and didn't look like letting up any time soon. A typical SAMCRO party, Jax noted with pride. His gaze looked over the throes of people, some new faces mingled amongst the familiar ones. He smiled and took a mouthful of his beer, knowing that very soon he would become a Prospect and follow in his father's footsteps.

He felt her arms envelop his waist and clasped her hands around his as she nuzzled into his neck. His face cracked into a broad grin. She was the only other thing that he wanted in life.

"Hey baby" she whispered into his ear. "How's the birthday boy doing?"

He turned around to face her, noticing that her eyes were slightly bloodshot. She stared at him doe eyed, her green staring into his blue. "I'm all good babe, but you look a little tipsy darling"

She smiled, the slowness of her actions confirming his thoughts. "I'm not drunk baby. Just high on love for you"

Jax laughed so loudly that some guests turned around to see what they had missed. When they saw the usual sight of Jax and Eddie Knowles' girl wrapped up in each other they turned back to their beer. Jax continued to laugh at her corny line "Wow, babe. I thought I was the one that had all the cheesy lines"

Tara looked at him and savoured his smile. It was her favourite thing about him. Even though there were many things to admire about Jackson Teller, his smile always made her heart skip a beat. Yeah, definitely cheesy, she thought, but she knew she was in love was him.

Time to remind him how much.

She tightened her grip around his waist "Have you mingled and spent time with everyone here? Have you thanked them for coming along tonight and laughed at all their unfunny jokes? Did you smile politely when the women told you that you'll turn into a heartbreaker and that you wouldn't stand a chance if they were thirty years younger? And have you quipped at the guys who give you shit about still not having your own Harley?"

Jax looked at with confusion. _She's definitely drunk_, he thought. "Er, yeah" he replied.

"Good" Tara said as she stepped out of his embrace and took his hands in hers. "Because that means that I now have time to give you my present"

Jax frowned, knowing that she had given him his present this morning, a golden bullet that hung on a long chain, which hung around his neck now.

Her face lit up into a mischievous smile, whispering "And your present is in your bedroom"

She turned away from him and headed towards the corridor that would take her towards the back of the Clubhouse. To the dorm. As she did she lifted the back of her black silk top slightly, flashing the black crow that marked her as his and threw a smile over her shoulder at him. Her eyes were now filled with lust.

Jax settled his beer on the wooden counter and smiled, he could feel his body start to respond to the thoughts that crept into his mind about him and Tara in that dorm. He caught up with her halfway down the passage way, grabbed her hand and pushed her into his dorm, smothering her giggles with his kisses.

He couldn't imagine a day when he didn't have Tara Knowles in his life, and he never wanted to.


	8. kiss her in the rain

**_As always, enjoy xxx_**

**_Kiss her in the rain….._**

His first run with the club had been to Oregon. Tara's face was not a pretty sight when Jax had told her that the run would last for three days. Neither had been away from the other for that long.

Their love for each other was obsessive. To Gemma it was unhealthy, she regularly reminded Jax that he should play the field while he was young, not get bogged down in a relationship. To the members of the club the 'love' was plain and simple sex, although most were impressed that Jax hadn't strayed since the relationship had begun. God knows he'd had his fair share of women before he and Tara had stepped out together. So in their minds it must have been really good sex.

But to Jax and Tara it was out and out love. It was crazy, wild, tempestuous love. Both admitted it was intense, if they weren't yelling at each other they were fucking. But no one other than Jax and Tara saw the real moments in their relationship, no one heard the plans they made, saw the delicate touches they gave one another, or over heard the things that they said to each other that would make them laugh for hours on end. It was those moments that made them understand that this was real. This was forever.

So to tell her that he had to leave her tomorrow for three days had been pretty damn hard. She had closed her eyes for what felt like a lifetime, silently cursing the club for taking him away. But she wouldn't complain. She knew that Jax had always wanted to be a member of Samcro, to follow in his father's footsteps. He wanted to make his old man proud. She couldn't deny him that. She opened her eyes, feeling the familiar fire grow deep in her belly as she looked across at him.

She stepped forward and ripped open his navy blue shirt, an action that momentarily startled him, his blue eyes widening in confusion. She clasped his head in her hands, bringing his mouth close to hers, her lips touching his as she spoke to him "Well, if you're leaving me tomorrow you better give me something to get me through these next three days"

Her hands tugged his shirt off him and he smiled into her mouth, turning her so that her back was now against her bedroom wall. He tugged at the tight denim of her jeans, yanking them off in desperation, as she reached down to unbuckle his belt and undo his jeans. As he slipped inside of her she arched further into him, a small moan escaping her lips, her hands resting on his shoulders, her fingers momentarily digging into him as he delved deeper. Both tried not to think about the absence of the other as his hips frantically thrust deeper into her making her moans louder.

Over the next three days Jax had called her every opportunity he got. He got shit for it from the guys, and he was starting to get sick of the term 'pussy whipped' every time he walked towards a payphone to call her.

On the journey home the heavens had opened, hard rain soaked each member to the bone. It meant that they had to slow down, the rain had made the roads more treacherous. Numerous times had Clay shouted for Jax to slow down but the only thought Jax had had was getting back to Tara. Of burying himself deep inside her so that her absence in these last few days seemed no more than a distant memory.

As they entered the compound of the clubhouse, Jax didn't see Tara as he rode passed her, the hard rain and night sky making her tiny frame hard to distinguish.

Parking up, Jax dismounted and took off his helmet, the rain instantly wet his golden hair and the cold water trickled down his neck. He now resented Clay for insisting that the club sat down at Chapel to digest the events that had taken place in Oregon. What pissed Jax off more is that he believed he was deliberately doing it to deny him time with Tara, to remind Jax of his priorities. As if he could fucking forget. It would be at least another hour, if not more, until he could make his way to Tara's. Jax sighed as he started to walk away from his bike and he looked up to jubilant Tara running towards him.

Clay noticed Tara at the same time. "Oh Christ" he muttered, quickly turning to Jax "Hey Romeo, it would seem that your fair Juliet is here!"

Within seconds she had reached Jax, jumping up into his arms, her long legs wrapping tightly around his waist. She had become so desperate to see him that she had waited for two hours, in the rain and drenched to the bone, to see him come home.

"I missed you" she murmured against his lips, the rain hitting their needy bodies.

He smiled as his hands lazily moved over her legs that were tightly wrapped around his waist and across her backside. His body started to react to the images he had of if they were in this position horizontally "I missed you too babe"

And as their kiss deepened and he gripped her tighter against him in the pouring rain, Jax realised that was exactly where he needed to be.

Home.


End file.
